I do have other kids

I do have other children that I photograph. I really do. Just to show you that I do, here are some of Samuel:


First baseball game and it was cold. Poor kid didn't have any toys to play with that game and was quite bored.

I call this his "Mom the sun and sky is too bright" face. ;)

I have NO idea where he got those eye lashes, but aren't they gorgeous?

Here is JM - playing baseball. He plays right field and catcher - depending on the game, depending on the inning, and depending on how much he is focused and hustling that game. ;)


Poor kid, I told Dh to get that size pants. See last year, we got the mediums. They were WAY too small. We ended up purchasing another pair for him to wear. So, I had Dh hold the sample pair up to JM during registration. He said that the Larges were not even making it to both sides of the waist. Then, the XL size just barely made it halfway around his waist. I *thought* that the 2nd pair we bought last year were L, so I told Dh that I thought XL was the size he needed.

Obviously, I thought wrong. Those are just a little TOO big. As soon as the kids clothing envelope has a little in it, JM is getting a smaller size pair of pants. It's much easier to play in too large of pants than it is to play in too small though, which is why we're holding off for now.


One thing is for certain though, he WILL be wearing a belt to every game this year!




Oh look we remembered Samuel's toys for this game:


of course, I have to include a few photos of Katie, I just can't help myself.



Does she not look just thrilled to be there? So incredibly happy to be sitting outside at a baseball game? yeah. I thought not.

Quick update on our lives

This little face? It's not always that happy. Yes, I'm here to tell you that she is fully into that toddler stage of wanting to be more independent, yet want you to hold them still. She's not quite sure what she wants, other than to feel better (yes sick again). It's been a rough few days dealing with whine and fuss and lots of energy.

Actually, it's been a busy time lately. Both boys are playing baseball, we're finishing up the school year and preparing for next year (which starts June 1), Katie is keeping us busy learning new things, and quite honestly, life is just super duper busy! I hardly have time to see friends. Isn't that just terrible?

I looked at our schedule for the next few months (through mid-July) in order to help schedule a game day with some friends. The next time I have a COMPLETELY free Saturday is June 7th, then again in mid-July. I could not believe it! Honestly though, June 7th is iffy due to baseball tournaments and team parties. My personal email inbox seems to collect about 50-100 new emails daily. Many of which I'm sure I miss responding to.

Dh and I were talking this weekend about how busy our life is now. How fast the days and weeks seem to go. How we need to slow down, enjoy this time in our lives...but we don't see how. Unless we physically start carving out time for our family. Make "Family Time" a priority. We know we have to, and we are working on that. Thus, the realization of when my "free Saturdays" are in the next few months.

Playdate a few weeks ago...

Boy am I behind or what?

Notice that Katie loved the baby doll in the stroller? I think she needs a stroller, don't you? She's such a good "Mommy" to her baby dolls.

Katie's Pillowcase Dress

Birthdays, Baseball, and...

boys? That could work for a title.

It's "Birthday" mini-season here in our family. I won't reveal when my own was or is, but it is in April. I'm over 30, and that is all we're going to talk about that. However, my nephew turned 2 recently and we enjoyed our trip up to visit with him and his family. Okay, it was a bit rushed, but we loved it.

It was rushed because we had baseball games and practice on the Saturday prior to the birthday party. To make it even more fun, the game and practices were in the afternoon, meaning we could not leave to drive up to my sisters until well after 5pm. It made for a rather long night, especially since we adults stayed up until 2:30 am playing Rook. I'm pleased to say that my Sis and I won both rounds against the guys. Yes we did. However, we will not admit that it might have had something to do with the fact that it was after midnight when we were playing and we were extraordinarily lucky. "Sleepy drunk" is the best way to play.

The Boys loved playing with their cousins. They flew some kites. They played some Wii. They slept in sleeping bags, they giggled, they talked, and they drove us crazy. Not really, but it was wonderful to see them bond some more this weekend.

While the boys were "bonding" us girls were "crafting" downstairs. I learned how to make a pillowcase dress this weekend, and our first attempt turned out rather cute (especially as my Sister's MIL greatly helped us out in making it all turn out incredible). Katie now owns her FIRST "custom" outfit for Disney. As it is a pillowcase dress it should fit for a few years, and hopefully she'll get lots of wear out of it. (yes a photo is on it's way to the blog soon) It was quite funny though as something that turned out for practice, kept getting embellished until we have this dress that I could not have created on my own at all. For one thing, I don't have an embroidery machine. For another, my little tiny sewing machine could not do zig zag stithes OR handle seam with bias tape.

I think I'm going to be scoping out better machines (while drooling over my sister's).

Follow up on a comment....

I feel the need for discussion on this, as I know someone going through the "older stage" of separation anxiety. At Katie's age, and honestly, a little older, we can tell them "We'll be back after we go XYZ." They believe us, they like that. However, as we experienced some with Samuel, around the age of 4-5 a new awareness settles in. Children learn, not only that Mommy exists apart from them, but BAD THINGS can happen to Mommy while she is away. I don't want to lie to Katie when that happens, because we all know that we can't promise that NOTHING will happen to us. We don't know that. Just like we don't know for certain that we will all live to see our children with their grandchildren. We hope to. But we don't know for certain. KWIM?

I am trying to figure out WHAT to say to Katie when it's time for this. It's sort of like trying to figure out what to say about the birth parent issue. We don't know for certain that her birth parents loved her, we believe they did. But we can't know for certain. Just like we can't know for certain that all the information in her referral paperwork was correct (i.e. her finding story). All I can tell her is that this is what we know from her paperwork, and from that we BELIEVE this. We can tell her that she was well cared for by the orphanage, and we believe they loved her. We know that she was attached to her foster Mom.

With Samuel, when he was crying every time I left the house, or his needing to see me at the store at all times (no going to find a seat at the pizza place), we ended up telling him that I loved him very much and I would always do my best to come home to him. He understood something could happen to me, and that was what he was afraid of. We ended up having to explain to him what would happen if I did not come back to him, and that Daddy would take care of him and the grandparents would take care of him and the Aunts and Uncles would take care of him and love on him. Which worked except for times when Daddy and the others were not around (like I had to leave him with a friend while I went to a doctor's appointment). That friend and I explained to Samuel that she would love on him and take care of him until she could get him to Daddy, or grandparents, or aunts, or uncles! But somehow, I do not see this working as well with Katie. I am concerned that her past, and what she has gone through already, will make this harder to explain and to ease her fears. I could also be wrong about that as well.

However, JM never went through that stage that we know of. Of course, he was never anxiously attached at any point either.

A few snapshots...

these are since Easter. I am trying to get a few of the kids just in everyday life. LOL

Does it not look like Katie just ADORES her biggest brother! LOL This is the look, and action she gives me every time one gets close for a "sibling" shot.

Life just will not slow down!

I keep hoping for a day where I can relax, process photos and upload them here. But, alas, we seem to be getting busier!

baseball, karate, classes, field trips, family events, and oh yeah...life! :)

I still have not been able to get my side-bar added back in, so I'm going to create as many of my links here as possible. Perhaps you will find some good reads as well!

Anxiously Attached

We've been busy here in our household, and the past few posts were written way back at least a month ago...thus, their rather "less than personal" info about daily happenings in our house. Why have we been busy? Well, baseball season is in full swing, and Katie is anxiously attached. I've not talked a lot about what all is going on with her as it is pretty good for the most part.

But, anxious attachment is something that is definitely creating issues during the day. Katie wants to touch me, see me, or have me hold her the entire time she is awake. She seeks me out wherever I might be if she hears my voice. She follows me around the house during the day while I try to clean. She constantly wants to be held. I do pick her up and rock with her, cuddle her, and give her a lot of attention. But sometimes, I need some "alone" time too. We went through a little of this right after getting home, but it's definitely different this time. Dh even sees it. Katie does great with Dh, she can part from him in a healthy "toddler" way. But me? I think she fears I will not return. It has meant that bedtime and naptime have become more of a struggle if I am the one putting her down. She does not like it at all when I leave the room.

I am thinking she is going through something relating to trust, attachment, bonding, or grief as she has increased her bond to me, increased her trust that we will always love her (more tantrums and whining and bothering the boys), more fear of other people (including friends), and she is waking some at night crying. It's not every night, but it is more often. Almost as if she is having a nightmare or something. I've learned NOT to bring her to bed unless she is inconsolable. She tends to think the bed it "playtime" and proceeds to poke my eyes, pull my hair, slap at my face, and tackle me.

We've also seen a huge increase in stranger anxiety. She runs and hides her face in my legs when anyone she doesn't recognize talks to her (like "Hi Katie!"). We went on a playdate with some friends for her (photos in a later post), and it took a good 30 minutes for her to warm up to them. She loves playing in the church nursery, but going to someone's home was a little hard for her. Or it could be the fact that it was her first playdate with some of our FCC friends. I do not know.

Something else that was surprising is that Katie is VERY protective of HER toys. She'll share toys that are not hers, but if it is her toy beware! At the ballfield, one of the parents picked up her doll that she had dropped and she screamed in anger at them, snatched the doll from their hands, and pushed the doll to my arms. It was almost "Don't take my doll! Here Mommy, keep my doll safe from them!" She was okay sharing her ball with another baby there, so I do not know if that is it totally. It could easily be the doll. She seemed to attach to the doll quickly when I gave it to her (it's the newborn Cabbage Patch doll, and she wants me to have the older one). We sit during the day with her cuddling her doll, and she insists I hold and "love" on the bigger doll.

I printed one of the photos of Katie from Easter rather large, and had it framed. Katie is in awe of it. She points to it with a big grin on her face and says "Mama." I am choosing to think it means "Oh thank you Mama, I love seeing myself so big on the wall. I love seeing that I belong on the wall with the boys." :) Most likely, she's just loving seeing herself period. She loves to look in mirrors and has the same reaction. LOL

If I've not visited your blog recently, please leave me a comment with the link. I lost my side-bar blog list recently and I'm trying to remember all the blogs I visited. I am going to have to link it here on this blog, and let all you wonderful people see how I procrastinate. I do it so well too. ;)

Now, for the GOOD that Katie is doing. She is using more words now. Hi, Hiya, Bye, uh-oh, Mama, Dada, Baba, aannn-ooooo (thank you), no, yep, ah-on (all gone), and hot. Oh, she roars too. She wants me to cradle her and cuddle her some. She brings me books to "read" to her (we get about 3 pages and she wants to switch, unless it's the 5 Little Ducks book). She learned how to climb the stairs, and despite a few falls, is still going strong. She is learning to run, truly run. It's a little "waddle" still, and still very much a toddler style run...but OH so cute. Especially as she is laughing hysterically as you chase her to the bathroom that is open...she's going for the toilet. Although, she recently discovered the joys of unrolling the toilet paper.

and Lisa, remember Regan's washing of hair in the humidifier water? Katie found an open toilet the other day and we found her with wet hair, wet arms, wet shirt front...and a huge PROUD smile. She got a bath. Luckily it was OUR bathroom (yeah we're all trying to remember to shut doors in our home). At least I know it was clean!

Katie LOVES to torment her brothers. From hitting them with a toy if they don't obey her every command (you know the ones in her mind that she expects them to mind-read), to helping herself to anything and everything in their room...it's so joyous to hear "Kaaaaa-teeeeeee give me that NOW. Give it back!" and "OW!!! Kaaaaa-deeeeeeee! Moooooooooooo-aaaaaaaaaaaaammmmmmmm Katie hit me!" Life is grand.

Remind me sometime to update you on the boys. Poor Samuel is feeling the brunt of adding a child. We're trying to remember to give him lots of attention. He's doing great.

Those of you just dying to know. We made it to 8 weeks of someone in the house having some medical illness or issue. I put some lotion on Katie and she broke out badly. Or it was a rash from a viral infection (that cold) ending. Her cough is better. Samuel's is not. Katie definitely needed albuterol with the worst of the cough (and hated it). Samuel has only needed the rescue meds a couple of times...he's also running low on allergy meds now. 8 weeks. I won't count the asthma issues this week unless Samuel gets worse (meaning it's back to bronchitis).

What's that? My hip is vibrating?

Blackberries...we got 'em. We're addicted. However, it has been very nice to be able to get emails while I'm out in various places...like Karate, the doctor's office waiting room, the gas station while Dh is pumping the gas, shopping at the grocery store, sitting waiting on our turn to go eat, or sitting at church waiting on Dh to get out of choir. Those are just the places in the last 3 days.

I even enjoy having it with me while I'm cleaning downstairs as I know for a fact that I have not gotten an email and I do not need to stop and check my email...and surf the web. Yes, indeed, my house is a teensy tiny bit cleaner. Unfortunately I've lost my number one excuse for procrastination.

I sit at the computer, with emails open, and on the internet...and what should happen? My hip vibrates. I know, without looking, that I've gotten another email. When I'm sitting with Dh watching a show, I vibrate and I know I have gotten another loving email from those spammers. Ah yes...such wonderful emails about oh so...um...interesting things.

Crackberries are good for staying in touch with all your emails. Not so good on the hands or fingers.

Do you have a testosterone meter?

We sure do! It's that invisible meter in your home that detects when the level of testosterone in the house suddenly drops. That is, Dh leaves for an overnight trip. It never fails, Dh leaves for a trip and something happens. An appliance will break, or the toilet will leak, the kids will get sick, or I will get sick, or heaven forbid, the car breaks down. It only happens when Dh leaves town.

I used to think it was only me, but all my friends mention the same thing happens to them as well. I've heard from a few with teenage boys that the phenomenon of Dh leaving causing the cars to break down, appliances breaking, etc. ceases to happen. Must be they provide enough testosterone. Those Moms have told me the only thing likely to cause a crisis at that point is running out of food.

Still have not figured out how to trick it, where it is located, or what to do about it short of keeping Dh home! If you find it, will you please tell me?

30 good things

Heather challenged herself to write down 30 things that are good about her life awhile back. Reading her list challenged me.

“The best things about sunny days is that they remind us that the gloomy days are only temporary. Take a minute to list thirty things that are great about your life (and the more trouble you have doing it, the more you need to do it!) Tuck your list somewhere safe and refer to it when you need a reminder that a sunny day is just around the corner… ”
-The Rainy Day Book

I don't often have "rainy days" these days, but I know how much I do not focus on all that is good in my life. Reading Heather's blog, I'm often challenged to grow in my faith, to be less selfish, to be more celebratory of life. The day to day life that is truly living SHOULD be celebrated often. Because I often lose pieces of paper, and journals, I have found that the blog is a great place to write down all sorts of things...including my own list of 30 "GREAT" things in my life.

1. I have the best husband in the world...for me.
2. I have 3 amazing kids.
3. My parents love me and my family.
4. My in-laws are wonderful and loving toward our family.
5. My siblings are always there for us (yes, even the sibling-in-laws)
6. I have best friends. Yes, multiple best friends.
7. I have the privilege of being a stay at home mom.
8. We are all fairly healthy.
9. I have the best nephews in the world.
10. Dh has a job he seems to love. Makes all the difference.
11. My family fully supports my photography.
12. Such things as romance novels exist.
13. Samuel's hugs.
14. John Mark's looks he gives me.
15. Katie saying "yep" to "Are you Momma's girl?"
16. Playing a musical instrument, even if it doesn't sound too pleasant to others all the time (you have to practice a lot to make it beautiful sometimes).
17. Telephones that exist to keep me connected to friends that are far.
18. I got to experience the miracle of all that adoption is.
19. I got to experience the pain of infertility, and lived through it.
20. I got to experience pregnancy and all that goes with that.
21. Dave Ramsey, Mary Hunt, Larry Burkett and the lessons I've learned from them all giving us PEACE in finances.
22. We have a home that is not a stretch for our budget.
23. Family vacations. No matter where they are.
24. Friends who will let me call them just to chat when I'm bogged down in the myraid minute details of my life.
25. My education. I love being able to surprise people.
26. High speed internet. I remember dealing with dial-up, and I'm ever so thankful for high speed.
27. My loyal blog readers who comment.
28. Having a church family who calls to check on us, who knows us by name, and having them remember our concerns and prayer requests.
29. Having friends who will chat with me online, pretty much any time of night or day.
30. Having a faith and belief system, and knowing that I am unconditionally loved by Him.

Do you know, that this was much harder than I thought it would be. 30 things that are GREAT about my life, it seems so easy. But listing 30 things is tough, as evidenced by the...ummm...less than high and lofty ones (i.e. 26 & 12).

Oh, thought of more

31. Katie sleeps through the night for the most part.
32. Being able to homeschool my children and see when they get a new concept, totally get it!
33. I'm another year older, hopefully another year wiser.

More photoshop

What exactly do I do? It all depends on the photo.

This one:

Again, adjusted the RAW image for exposure and color balance, ran my quickie actions (it's a slight sharpen, a curves adjustment, and a levels adjustment...oh and Noiseware/Portraiture to help smooth out the grain if there is any).

I take this image, and I "pick it apart" in my head. I do not like how bright the grass is. Not much I could do about that since I took it in full sun, which left Katie slightly underexposed in the SOOC shot. This image I adjusted exposure down slightly and brightened it. I do not care for how light the pink dress has become either. I also do not like that red dot in the background! LOL



So, what did I do exactly? I took out the curves and the levels, then I ran an action that is called V-Pop, which has a slight orange tint to it along with the curves pop (why I took out the basic curves and levels). I then adjust the opacity of it, use layer masks to mask out the grass (don't like it popped as it turned it too bright again). After running that, I ran another action that pushes up the "blues" in the photos and saturates them...at least that is what I think it does. After running that I again adjust opacity and use layer masks to mask the portions I do not want adjusted. Finally, I run a vignette action that I bought and love. It's fully adjustable on the shadows, midtones, and highlights...typically I only adjust the midtones, and then after it is done I use a layer mask. Surprise. When running the vignette, you have to REALLY watch out for "halo effect" around the subject. When I'm in a hurry, I often don't care. If I'm printing it, then I really pay attention to it.

OH, prior to running the V-Pop action I played with the eyes...sharpening the edges and brightening the irises.

This image, I did not like the full frame crop that I had in camera, and adjusted for a creative crop (many times I do not do this step for putting on the web). I like this crop, it's a 1::2 ratio.

Notice, the adjustments I made are MINOR ones. Each step is done on it's own layer, and the background image is rarely changed (it gets the basic defog, noiseware/portraiture, and sometimes further sharpening...but only in rare cases). As for that pesky red dot? I removed it on the background image. I used the patch tool and corrected it. Patch tool is great for the portions of an image where you do not have a lot of texture (or that texture is blurred). Not so great on things like hair, clothing, grass that is in focus...

On my way to bed...

I noticed the lights were still on upstairs. So I went up to turn them off. Since I was up there I might as well check to see if I had any new emails. Since I was checking emails I might as well check to see if any of the blogs I read had updated in the last few hours. A few had, so I had some fun reading. A friend saw I was online, we chatted for a few. We ogled boutique clothing on ebay, which meant I found something I wanted for Katie. So, I emailed the link to another friend to ask her opinion. Since I was emailing her, I thought I would check to see who was online on my forums. Which meant that I might as well check to see if anything had happened in the world of China adoption. Or adoption in general. Then, I thought I would check on another blog.

At which point I noticed the time...at least an hour has passed.

I turned out the lights and was on my way to bed...

Katie cried. Samuel coughed. Backs rubbed. Water gotten. 30 more minutes have passed.

I'm going to bed!

Dreaming of Disney

A friend online is planning her trip, we got to talking, and now I'm dreaming of Disney. Thrill rides, food, characters, hot humid weather, monorail rides, and way too expensive park food. Ah....the stuff of dreams.

Photos from our last trip:








You know, the kids always seem to behave better, we seem to laugh more, play more, and enjoy each other more while at Disney. At least that is what I remember...until I see the photos of the tantrums.

and for those that know about this ride...further proof we're not competitive or anything...

Dh's score:

My score:


I think we need a rematch! LOL Those scores are the result of having ridden this ride about a total of 40 times now. Or are we closer to 100 times than I realize?

A few portraits to share...

my cousin's had me take a few portraits of their kids when we were together recently, and wanted to show them a few.



oh look...another one of Katie! LOL

Thankful Thursday

Because we are commanded to be thankful in all things...

I'm thankful for our snotty nosed household, making this the 7th week of "pestilence" in our home. We have had days of being healthy, but I believe we've yet to go a full 7 days. I believe this is some sort of record. Yes I do. 3 are "down" with 2 to go...will they succumb? Will we make it to 8 weeks?

It's a mild cold, caught from cousins over Easter I'm sure. I'll take the cold since I loved seeing everyone.

Of course, with spring arriving and everything "pollinating" it could easily be allergies.

Wow....what memories

Samuel is roughly the same age as Katie in these photos, and JM is roughly Samuel's age now...wow.







I'm looking for older ones of JM...I know I have a few scanned in of him from early on, but it's tough...oh wait I have ONE from when he was 12 months. However, it's not wanting to upload at the moment.

New skill!

Do you notice what is not in the background? What is not up? What is causing me much stress? A few heart stopping moments?





The gate! Katie can navigate stairs now. Our lives will never be the same.

Photoshop Magic

This is the difference between my batch post-processing and my normal post-processing!

Batch: Not bad, pretty much straight out of the camera with slight adjustments to the RAW image, then sharpened slightly, colors popped, and that's it.


This one has my normal post-processing to ready for printing.


I do the normal stuff, then I vingette the image (darken the outer edges). I ran an action that sort of makes the color vivid. It's one of my favorites...on certain images. Sometimes it doesn't look really good, others it looks great.

I'll show you others at a later date!

for now though, direct your thoughts to "Loving Lia" blog to the right. She's being seen by the neurosurgeon on Wednesday. I'm hoping that her parents get lots of answers.

Just a few from Great Grandma's house

These are NOT post-processed/edited how I plan on finishing them, but I had a few requests to see Katie in her Easter dress. :) Okay, ONE of the dresses!